Memory Lane, Virtual "Reality"

                                         


This morning a conversation with a friend turned down memory lane. I talked about going to my grandparents' house every Sunday when I was growing up. We would make the 70 mile trip after going to church.

My mom was an only child, her mom (Grandma Burns) was sick even before I was born. My grandfather (Grandpa Burns) was able to take care of her during the week. My parents would go grocery shopping for the week and bring KFC dinner home.

My younger sister and I would dust and vacuum, my older sister would help our mom change the bedding and do laundry. In the summer, my brothers would mow the lawn and do other outside work. When we were done, we sat on the couch, with our hands folded, until it was time to leave.

We would go to my dad's parents' house. My grandma would fix Sunday dinner, my aunts, uncles and cousins were all there. The kids across the street would come over and all of us would play outside.

Grandpa Burns had a heart attack and died when I was in 6th grade, Grandma Burns came to live with us. She had Parkinson's and was very frail, walking through the house, rocking in her rocking chair. She could never be still. I remember her right hand constantly, her mouth a clicking sound over and over. I can still hear her say, "Oh Bob..Oh Bob, why did you leave me?" (my grandfather's name)

Grandma Burns would sit in her rocking chair in the afternoon, waiting for my younger sister to get off the school bus. My sister would sit with her, tell her about her day and sometimes read to her. Grandma would have a spark in her eyes and smile.

My older sister would come home on weekends from college, where she was going to be a nurse. Grandma had long, beautiful hair. My sister would help with the extra care our grandmother needed.

My mom would hang laundry outside, grandma loved going out with her. One day, grandma fell and broke her arm. The hospital kept her for observation. Grandma died the next day from pneumonia.

My mother broke down at the cemetery. She kept sobbing, "I'm all alone." I didn't understand what she meant, how could she say she was alone. Losing my mother years later, I could understand. There is no other feeling like losing your mother.

Now that I am in my 60's, thinking back to those times, it really doesn't feel that long ago. I can put myself back there, seeing it as a child and now, as an older adult.

I don't know how my parents did what they did, and take care of 6 kids. I don't know how my mom was so strong, taking care of everyone, the house, laundry, everything.

Our family was very dysfunctional, yet the house was always clean, laundry done, never went hungry, my dad always worked hard. He worked just as hard at home as he did working for General Electric.

It was a different time, families always have had issues, yet it was assumed that when it came to being there for each other, they were... Every family is dysfunctional...

Social media has had a lot of positives, reuniting families and friends. Helping people to keep in touch. A support system for many people who are alone, lonely, sad, going through loss.

It has also caused a disconnect. "Reality" is now virtual. Texting has taken the place of a phone call or visit.

So much is out there, not tangible. Less visits, less physical contact, emails, texts, have taken the place of a personal letter. Ordering online is convenient, still, that personal touch is missing.

Sending a photo by text is awesome. Sending a message is great. Yet, hearing someone's voice is priceless.

I can't imagine my mom ordering groceries to be delivered once a week to her parents' and a hot meal. As hard as it was for my parents, I'm sure those weekly visits meant the world to my grandparents.

Yes, everyone's busy, life is hectic, that is nothing new.

We need "be there" for people we love.

Nothing can replace reaching out and actually touching someone.

Over 50 and a Path to New Employment

                                                                         

Over 50 and finding your way to new employment. Learn How to Become is an excellent online resource! 

The following is from their website:

If you have held multiple jobs throughout your working life or have been laid off, don’t forget that you developed many marketable skills over the years. Create a list of skills you have acquired and determine what you are good at so you can present yourself to employers. Don’t overlook general skills that are essentially transferable skills relevant to multiple occupations. Skills such as reading and writing, management skills, technical skills, and communication skills can transfer over to a number of positions and industries Use tools like the Career One Stop Skills Profiler          Toolkit Use  tools like the 

Check out the Toolkit. It is a great resource from Interest Assessment, Skills Profiler, to Job and Salary Finder and more!

Check out this great info Career One Stop

And don't forget to go to Learn How To Become

We are Amazing!

                                                                We Are Amazing!
                                                           

Wow, I was researching articles that are positive about women and aging. I came upon one very interesting one by Noelle Nelson written in April 2016 in Huffington Post.
In the article, she has a new name for Boomers! The Amazings!
Nelson writes:
"We are busting preconceptions, forcing by our very numbers, the world to look at us differently. We are redefining the years past 60 as years of growth, joy, fun, adventure, even romance! What we Amazings want Millennials (and every generation) to know, is that these individuals are not the exception. There are over 45 million people in the United States alone who are 65 and over (44.7 in 2013, according to the US Census). Most of these individuals are happy, healthy, and having a grand old time."

Reading the full article, she says that anyone can be an Amazing! Living positively, gratitude, and make "a deliberate decision to see the passage of years as simply movement through time."

Yep, and she also points out that all this, along with, happiness, optimism, helps us with our physical and mental well being!

I love what she wrote! Read her article about The Amazings

Ways women over 50 can achieve financial fitness before retirement part 2

                                                                         

                       
                                                             
                      Ways women over 50 can achieve financial fitness before retirement

the following info was found on pbs.org

By and large, women over 50 will have different financial challenges than their male counterparts, so keeping financially fit is important. 

Keeping physically fit is always important, but as we age, it becomes even more imperative to maintaining quality of life. Keeping physically fit is always important, but as we age, it becomes even more imperative to maintaining quality of life. According to personal finance expert and Next Avenue contributor Kerry Hannon, the same is true for financial fitness.


Hannon stresses the importance of “financial fitness” for women, and especially for female members of the baby boomer generation, who are now entering their fifties and beyond. “Women have been part of the workforce more in this generation than before,” Hannon says, they are also likely to stay in the workforce longer. The full retirement age for Social Security has risen from 65 to 67, and, according to Transamerica Center for Retirement Studies’ “Fifteen Facts About Women’s Retirement Outlook,” 57 percent of women plan to retire after age 65 or not at all.
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the following is my view

So, let's take a look at that last paragraph. Wow, 57 % of women plan to work past age 65, or not at all. Gee, I would love to know how many of that percentage of women are not planning to retire at all. I bet it would be a large part of that number.
When I hear on the news how the younger generation is the first to live as well financially as their parents, I think, oh really? How wrong that is... My parents were not rich, but my dad was able to retire and have pensions from two places he had worked, my mom was able to receive social security, although she never had a full time paid job. She did work part time throughout the years. She also raised six children. Now, so many women will not get social security and in reality, how many people, men or women are retiring now with pensions from 20 years or more?
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pbs

Women face some unique challenges in planning for their financial future. Women famously earn 78 cents for every dollar earned by men. In a recent article for Next Avenue, Hannon points out that women are more likely to deviate from their career paths by taking time off to raise children or care for aging parents. They also tend to work for smaller firms and nonprofits that may not offer to match employees’ contributions to their retirement savings plans, if they offer a plan at all. On top of that, Hannon says, “most American women will find themselves single at some point from the age of 65 to the end of life.” This means women should be prepared to navigate the financial world on their own in their golden years.
Research suggests the average American woman does not believe she is up to the challenge. A Fidelity study released in February found that 82 percent of women were confident in their ability to budget and manage their daily finances, but only 37 percent of women felt confident planning for their retirement. Hannon offers the following financial fitness regimen for women in their 50s who are seeking to increase their financial know-how.

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my view

It's kind of baffling that women feel they are not able to plan for their retirement. Yet they are usually the ones raising the children, balancing a job outside of the home, balancing money between childcare, food, bills, clothing, and emergencies.
Women usually put everyone first, and don't focus on their health, so it makes sense they wouldn't in later years.
In the next post, let's look at making time for ourselves. Fitness of mind and body.


Beginning article
http://olderwomenrockon.blogspot.com/2016/12/women.html

Technology and Family

                                                                   

                                                                         

Technology has had positive and negative influences on people's lives in so many ways.

Older people are no exception. 

Some of the positive ways, on a tech device it's usually easy to have a video call with our adult children and grandchildren. A simple emoji or a nice text message can be sent. Sending and receiving photographs and videos help us to see our family.

The downside: A text message on a special day instead of a phone call, not hearing you children's or grandchildren's voices for months at a time. The special times you may have had as a child with your own grandmother was something you wanted with your own grandchildren.

Yes, we understand that our children have their own lives, but to not even include us with a visit ever once in awhile, actually calling rather than texting.

Do you find yourself looking at your cell phone and wondering why they don't call? You can't figure it out because there hasn't been an argument, nothing you can pinpoint that was said or done to cause friction.

It's hard to find a way of coping with the emotional pain. There's no easy way to bring it up.

All I can tell you is that you are not alone, there are many older people out there going through the same thing.

No, technology is not the only reason for this confusing situation. But it's a convenient way for a relationship to be placed at a distance.